so, anyway...

a month later and no posts. it doesn't mean that nothing is happening, or that i have no thoughts or ideas. it doesn't mean that i have nothing to say. it just means that i don't sit in front of a computer for most of the day. it means that what is important is happening out there and not in here. it means that i am not so sure that it is important at all for me to tell you every thing i am thinking and doing, or what is happening to me. maybe i will write it down, maybe i won't. it is not that important. i have learned that the people that change the world, the people that make things happen, those people, they are not in here...they are out there. they are out there doing. they are not in here reading about others that have done. they don't have time for this electronic reality.

rp.

quote of the day

"anyone can become angry - that is easy. but to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way - that is not easy.

- aristotle


life is tough and sometimes i just want to poke a stick in my eye, but when i diligently and honestly think about where i am, and who i am...there is really no one to be mad at.
rp.

turn the page

well, last night was my last night sleeping on the floor of this office, and tomorrow will be my last day at this job. no longer will i be the illustrious director of educationes en la wilderness con carne... bla bla bla. the next chapter is highly uncertain, my anxiety sometimes builds and boils over, however if i step back and look at my life...this is how i roll. the details of my journeys are seldom written in ink, typically i say, "i'm going that way," then figure out how to get there as i go. i believe one step provides the view for the next. the short term will most likely find me doing what ever work i can to make money while i work on an idea i have had for some time to start a business; one that helps others, makes money, and gets me into the woods. how perfect is that!? i will also be living with and helping my mother with her transition into widowdom. and so, i realize that sometimes arriving at the place you wanted to go looks nothing like the brochure of the mind. my hope is that i don't ignore opportunity while complaining to the travel agent. i also have realized that i had better stay on great terms with my girlfriend lest the following pick-up line be overheard in some local joint..."uh, hi...my name is ronnie, im forty something, divorced with two kids, i drive a worn out truck full of dog hair, work a coulple of part time jobs, and live with my mother, want to come over for dinner?" ahhahahaahha. oh yes, baby, i think you can be assured that i will be on my best behavior and a certain nomine for "best boyfriend of the year."
rp.

quote of the day

"turn about 's fair play, boy."

- my step father, jack.
that was his redneck way of saying, "deal with it."

quote of the day

" if we develop properly, we transfer the source of approval from the world to ourselves; we shift from the external to the internal. but if one does not understand the nature and roots of adult self-esteem, but thinks in terms of "reflected appraisals," one is at a severe disadvantage when it comes to putting theory into practice."

-nathaniel branden
the six pillars of self esteem
p. 275

sigh

i honestly believe that the concept of effective communication between two humans may be the most difficult thing, to get right and keep right, that i have ever encountered. nonetheless, i hope to continoulsy improve, while in the back of my mind i ponder why most everything that makes for inner happiness defies the natural tendancies of instinct.

rp.

christmas spirit

i received this email this morning from the most awesomest lady of my life...


Often I find myself in a quandry after thinking things thru from the day before. Last night I was not excited at all about the events of the "ELF". This morning I awoke to find my children so very happy that Santa had answered their letter for their very own special elf. To my amazement, Travis was the most excited to have a boy elf who will watch over and tell Santa how good he is or isn't being.
With such a bad taste in my mouth from the experience of Christmas without my children last year, I had forgotten what the spirit of the holdidays is all about. My children reminded me this morning that it's not about me, it's not about last year, but it's about this year and all the many blessings I have been given. The joy on their faces this morning has made me cry. Why? Because lately my spirits haven't been where they should be; they haven't been appreciative and forth giving.
All this being said, I hope this holiday season, you and I can start some of our own memories and share with each other the joy of the Christmas spirit. I hope to make this a happy Christmas time for you and one that can help you to regain some of your childish joys.
I love you with all that I have and look forward to seeing you tomorrow night.
I miss you tons.
Laura

i love it when someone takes it upon herself to rise above, herself, and let go of selfish thinking. and babe, i humbly apologize for, and retract, my idea to kill off the elves in a tragic sleigh accident.
rp.

quote for the boat

"many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after."

-henry david thoreau